Arranged Marriages

The concept of arranged marriages is not a very unusual norm in India. It is how most of the Indians get married. No matter how westernized India may have become arranged marriages are still preferred in most of the Indian families. The concept of arrange marriage may sound impractical to the Western world but for Indians it is something they prefer. It is a system, which originated when child marriage was a custom in the country. The purpose of child marriage was to restrict the children from marrying outside their community and social status. The practice mainly began as a way of uniting and maintaining the rich and the upper caste families. Caste system gave birth to arrange marriage. The system mainly developed to promote caste system or racism. The system of arrange marriage has its pros and cons. On one side it is seen as a medium to promote racism and class system. On the other hand it gives parents control over family matters and members.

This system of arrange marriage, which originated mainly as the tool of the upper caste people to protect their community and to maintain their social status they wanted their children to marry someone from the same caste and same social background. Eventually it spread to the lower caste of the society where it is used for the same purpose. The rituals and customs of arrange marriages vary depending on the caste and religion of the people or whether he or she is a Hindu or a Muslim. Marriage is not just coming together of two individuals but an alliance between two families. The practices of arrange marriage has almost become synonymous with the Indian society and culture. Compare to earlier period the practices are not so rigid at present. But one of the social evil associated with arrange marriage is dowry in the modern Indian society. In most part of the country arrange marriage is the best medium to take dowry. Nowadays marriages are more like a trade than a social custom. People find it an easy medium to make money. This is one of the biggest drawbacks of arrange marriages.

Among the other drawbacks is that the boy and the girl doesn't get to know their future spouses before marriage. In arrange marriages it is not important to know your partner before marriage. Two unknown people get married without knowing and understanding each other. Just as every coin has two sides so do arrange marriages. There are even arrange marriages in which the parents who love their children and are concerned about their life take the consent of their children when they decide their marriage. Arrange marriages are successful only when the parent does not force their children to marry whom they don't want to marry. In a marriage there should be mutual consent and understanding from both side than only a marriage can sustain. Good arrange marriages happen when the parents support and help their children to find their life partners according to their desires and likings. Arrange marriages have certain ill effects on the society like it is biased over a particular religion, caste and a race. It is not healthy when parents are over protective and control their children's wishes and desires in choosing their partner. It is wonderful when children are given the right to make the final consent and decision on their marriage and also there should be arrangements for the would be husband and wife to meet and to understand each other.

A relationship cannot grow if there is no mutual consent and understanding from both the parties. Whether it is love or arranged marriage people look for the perfect life partner. But nobody is perfect on this earth. Everybody has certain drawbacks. But if we really love somebody we should accept that person with his or her faults and weakness. If we can accept a person the way he or she is than only we can leave a happily married life irrespective of love or arrange because the real success of marriage lies in love, respect, concern, empathy and loyalty for each other.